I promised to post updates on my back-to-school project occasionally in July. Until this week, however, there hasn’t been much to report. I continued my magical work, of course, working with two more spirits from the Ars Goetia. I spent a week with Marax learning to write more clearly, and another with Stolas resetting my sleep schedule. Regardless of whether or not I returned to college, I wanted to accomplish both of those things, so I didn’t feel like I was bothering either spirit for nothing.
As it turns out, I won’t be going back to school this September. I’m going to concentrate on my seminary training and writing, from home. I’ve also chosen to offer card readings again. At this point, I’m more than okay with that. It feels like the right thing to do. By doing this, I’m not only fulfilling a vow I made to myself, but fulfilling a vow I made to my gods a long time ago. A wise bear reminded of that, and I’m grateful.
As soon as I accepted that I wasn’t going to school and started putting energy into other things, it was like a weight lifted off of my shoulders magically. I judge my June work as “meh.” It produced similar results too. I just never quite hit the mark. Energetically, it all felt off, enough so that I worried I didn’t want to hit the mark. It’s a vicious cycle, since doubt alone can make magick weak. I felt no inner conflict whatsoever about this week’s work with Belphegor and Halphas, and they answered my request within 24 hours. I will make my final offering to them tomorrow.
I hope you all are having a great summer.